Basic HTML Version
Pamplin Media Group
Thursday, November 22, 2012
A6
Civil War 2012
341934.112212 CW
in McMinnville and Winnipeg
and San Antonio and Los Ange-
les and San Diego and New Or-
leans.
At first, Mike made sure to
provide ample time to spend
with his wife. Along the way
came children Matt, now 28,
and Kate, 24, and a new wrinkle
to the priority list.
Riley remembers his years
with the San Antonio Riders of
the World League in the early
‘90s, when the kids were very
young.
“After working all day, I’d go
home for dinner, read books to
the kids, help put them to bed,
and go back to work,” he says.
The children were a little
older when Riley served as of-
fensive coordinator at Southern
Cal from 1993-96.
“We used to laugh about it,”
Dee says. “Our kids had the lat-
est bedtimes of anybody in their
elementary school. It’s time
with the kids or no time with
the kids. Our choice was time
with the kids.
“That meant Mike would
come home earlier than usual
several nights a week and
spend an hour with each kid —
reading to them, praying with
them before they went to bed,
one-on-one, where they had
their dad’s undivided attention.
“When they’re adults, the
kids won’t remember that they
were sleep-deprived, but they
will know they had a close rela-
tionship with their dad.”
During the summers, the Ri-
leys always enjoyed vacation
time, whether at their place
near San Antonio or at the Or-
egon Coast, “or just by spend-
ing time at home,” Riley says.
“It’s all a good thing. Other
than when you are out recruit-
ing, there’s more of a regular
time schedule. It’s a little more
of an 8-to-5 job than during the
season. It’s not that hard to find
some balance that time of year.”
The job changes were diffi-
cult on the children, who had to
adjust to new friends, a new
school and a new environment.
“Those things are uncomfort-
able,” Riley says. “When I left
Oregon State (after two years to
coach the San Diego Chargers)
in ‘98, that was a tough one. If I
were to advise anybody, I’d
probably say don’t do it. The
kids survived and have done
well, but that was pretty diffi-
cult. That was always a big con-
cern of mine.”
Fortunately, Riley says, he al-
ways had his wife for stability
as the family’s rock.
“Dee has always been so
grounded on what’s important,”
he says. “If I’m missing a beat
somewhere, she’s there with a
reminder that this is what I
need to do.”
•
Life is pretty serene around
the Riley household these days.
The kids are grown and on their
own, but both are living in Cor-
vallis. Matt, three years into
marriage with his wife Lydia, is
a video specialist for the OSU
athletic department. Kate
works at a medical office in
town. Matt and Kate live in the
same apartment complex in
Corvallis and visit their parents
often.
“We selfishly guard the mo-
ments we can have family time
with the kids, even now,” Dee
says. “It’s like, ‘Pinch me, they
both still live in our town?’ Mike
and I don’t take that for grant-
ed. We know any time a job
could take either of them away.
We want to enjoy them while
we can.”
Dee and Kate see each other
“just about every day,” Dee
says, and they are in a walking
group that includes several
coaches’ wives that get togeth-
er three days a week.
There has been an added joy
for all of late in 15-month-old
Eli, the son of Kate and Beaver
cornerback Jovan Stevenson.
Active little Eli is the apple of
his grandparents’ eye.
“One of the most wonderful
things ever,” Mike Riley says.
“At first, it was hard to imagine
being a grandfa-
ther, but all of a
sudden, when that
happens, he be-
comes the center
of our life.
“He t o t a l ly
warms my heart
whenever I see
him. We’re just
fortunate he’s
here in town.”
“I’m smitten,
that’s all I can
say,” Dee says.
“Every child de-
serves to think
he’s the best little
child in the whole
world. Eli has lots
of love around
him.”
Eli sometimes accompanies
his grandmother or mother to
OSU football practice, where he
is always eager to greet grand-
pa with a hug.
“At least twice a week they
bring him by my office,” Mike
says. “He loves the office. I have
a little toy box set up for him.
He knows right where it is. He
is familiar with the people in
the office. He has become ev-
erybody’s adopted little boy.”
After the Beavers’ victory at
UCLA in September, Eli wound
up in his grandpa’s embrace as
he was about to meet with the
media.
“I’d just gone out to see Dee
like I do after every game, and
all of sudden Eli’s in my arms,
and then all the reporters are
there to do the post-game inter-
views,” Mike says, smiling.
“And there we were for every-
body to see. He enjoyed it, I
think. He liked the attention.”
Matt and Lydia, who have no
children, engage in a weekly
“Sunday fun day” in which they
take Eli all day “so he can get to
know his aunt and uncle, which
is so sweet,” Dee says.
At the four-bedroom south
Corvallis home in which the Ri-
leys have lived since their re-
turn to OSU in 2003, Dee has
plenty of play things for Eli, in-
cluding a miniature drum set
and a “Lightning
McQueen” tent —
which has also be-
come a nesting
place for their lov-
able 2-year-old
boxer, Rodney.
Rodney has helped
salve the wounds
left by the summer
passing of Rudy, a
shepherd/husky
mix who shared a
walk nightly with
Mike.
Now Riley walks
Rodney, but also
finds time for fre-
quent walks with
his wife in the
neighborhood, or if
time permits, in
Avery or Willamette Parks or at
Bald Hill.
“It’s our time together, and
it’s important,” he says.
•
The family dynamic has
changed since the August death
of Mike’s father, Bud, a long-
time coach who spent many
years as an assistant at Oregon
State. Mike’s mother, Mary, has
been at her son’s home for
three weeks and will stay at
least through Christmas.
Bud and Mary Riley lived in
rural Kaleden, British Colum-
bia, since his retirement in
1987. Mike and Dee hope she
will make a permanent move to
Corvallis, where she would al-
so be closer to her other sons
— Pete, who lives in Naselle,
Wash., and Ed, who is in the
Bay Area.
“It’s been something we’ve
been hoping for for a long
time,” Mike says. “The timing
is right for Mary. Pete’s rela-
tively close, and Ed can get up
here often. We’ve all seen each
other more recently than in a
long period of time.”
“I’d love to,” Mary says of be-
coming a Corvallis resident
again, “but I won’t do anything
right away. They say you
should wait awhile, so I will.
But I should be here, because I
don’t have anybody up there”
in British Columbia.
•
One day when Riley was
serving as assistant head coach
with the New Orleans Saints in
2002, his wife spoke to him
about the future.
“Mike always loved the Pac-
10 more than anything,” Dee
says. “I told him, ‘You know
what is the best town in the
whole Pac-10? Corvallis. I could
live there forever. It’s the best
place we could live in for family,
for friends, for quality of life.’ “
Two weeks later, OSU coach
Dennis Erickson resigned to
take the head coaching job with
the San Francisco 49ers. Two
weeks after that, the Rileys
were back in Corvallis. Seren-
dipity.
“I just love our life,” Dee says
as she relaxes in front of the
fire at home. “I love Corvallis
— the people, the schools, how
far we live from Mike’s office,
the downtown area, Monroe
Street ... I love everything
about it.”
Mike Riley’s heart is in Cor-
vallis and with a group of play-
ers on whom he is always try-
ing to impart life lessons.
“There is no picking and
choosing what you know is im-
portant,” he says. “If you want
to be a reliable person, then
you have to do it all. Our play-
ers have responsibilities in
football and responsibilities in
school, but it is also their re-
sponsibility to do the right
thing, to be a good person.
“That’s the balance they
need. It’s the same way in my
life. Work and family are priori-
ties, and you have to make sure
your responsibilities with both
get done.”
Riley:
Family helps keep coach on even keel
■
From page 1
TRIBUNE PHOTO: CHRISTOPHER ONSTOTT
Oregon State coach Mike Riley tells his players the importance of balance in their lives: “If you want to be a
reliable person, then you have to do it all.”
TRIBUNE PHOTO: KERRY EGGERS
Mike Riley and his mother, Mary, and wife, Dee, share time at home in
an otherwise busy weekday for the Oregon State coach. Mary is
visiting from Kaleden, British Columbia, through at least Christmas
and might move back to Corvallis.
TRIBUNE PHOTO: CHRISTOPHER ONSTOTT
Mary Riley, mother of Oregon State coach Mike Riley, and Dee Riley, the
coach’s wife, talk about their 15-month-old grandson while relaxing in
the living room of their Corvallis home.
“Dee has
always been so
grounded on
what’s
important. If I’m
missing a beat
somewhere,
she’s there with
a reminder that
this is what I
need to do.”
— Mike Riley,
OSU coach